Show her affection. Girls want guys to show them affection because it tells her that you care about her, and that you’re willing to show that love in a public way. It doesn’t always have to be public (PDA), but get used to the idea, because she wants other people to see how much you love her, so don’t be afraid to kiss her or hold her hand in public.
Tell her she’s beautiful. You have to show her that you mean what you said. If you’re really sincere when you tell her how beautiful she is to you, you’re going to go a long way.
Also, tell her that she drives you crazy, and that she’s the prettiest thing in school. Tell her that you’ve never met anyone like her.
Compliment her on her looks, but also on her accomplishments, talents and abilities. If she’s a great poker player, tell her she’s smart. If she’s a good listener, tell her she’s great with other people.
Tell her you love her. Make sure you mean it. If you’re not ready to go there yet, that’s fine. But, be sure to switch that “I love you” for a really good “You know how special you are to me?” or a “I like you so much; I’m a really lucky guy.”
Simple is best. Stick with “I love you,” or “You make me so happy,” or “I’m really lucky to have you.” Don’t be so poetic that you go overboard.
These statements make her feel good, and they make her self-confidence soar. Remember, when her self-confidence is high, you benefit. Be steady with your signs of love or affection, enough so that she doesn’t forget how much you mean to her, but not so much that the power of the words gets watered down.
Touch her regularly and on the spur of the moment. Even the slightest touch can make a woman feel special. Make sure it’s a respectful and gentle touch, and not one that’s overly sexual or suggestive.
Hold her hand, give her a hug, rub her back, or gently touch her face. These gestures will all make her feel protected and loved!
There’s a time and a place for foreplay, but you’re not doing yourself any favors if you go there when she’s not ready. Make sure she’s totally comfortable before you start exploring your sexual relationship.
Put her first, yourself second. Put her needs in front of yours. This doesn’t mean that you have to be whipped, or lose your backbone. It just means that, most of the time, you’re willing to bend for her, even if it wasn’t something you wanted to do.
If you believe she is “Ms. Right,” then make her your number one priority! They say that love is selfless; you’re going to have to prove it to her.
If you’re with your friends, never ignore her and start talking with your friends or walk off with them as if she’s not there. How would you feel if she did this to you? Invisible, right? Keep close to her or glance at her every so often just to let her know you know she’s still there and offer a genuine smile.
Listen to her. One of the biggest complaints women have about men is that they don’t listen. Even if you’re not particularly interested in what she’s saying, listen, then acknowledge that you were listening. Let her know that you are the one that she can talk to about anything.
Every woman loves a bit of alone-time with her partner. Book a whole day for the two of you to be alone. Watch a movie, massage her back, snuggle and be intimate. Put other thoughts out of your head and focus completely on her. You’ll notice more of a connection when you do this, and that’s what you want. Try to schedule a bit of alone-time with her at least every month or so.
Part 2 of 4: Treating Her Right
Treat her with dignity. Treating your girl with dignity means treating her the way that you would want to be treated. Don’t swear at her, manipulate her, use her for your own benefit, or shoot down her ideas. Making her as happy as possible is a goal, so it’s not going to happen overnight. But work toward it slowly, and try as hard as you can, even if you don’t succeed.
Always stand up for her no matter what. Sticking up for her shows her that you are on her side, and that you’re willing to take a public stand for her, which isn’t easy.
At the same time, don’t put yourself in an impossible situation. If she’s having an argument with her parents right in front of you, you probably don’t want to take a stand and risk upsetting her parents (who might control a lot about her life). Stay out of family matters as much as possible, but give her backup when she asks for it.
Don’t argue in public and cause a scene. This will humiliate her and you; she’ll think twice about going out with you again. Stay calm when you have a fight, try as much as possible not to let your emotions take over, and treat her the way that you want to be treated. Keep your voice down, don’t yell at her, and expect to apologize, even if you didn’t do anything wrong.
Share your everyday events and thoughts with your girl. Being open and communicative makes her feel like you want her in your life. Being intimate isn’t just about getting to know her body; it’s also about sharing the things that happen to you, and going through them together.
On the same note, listen to her advice, even if you don’t agree. Force yourself to listen and to see her reasoning. Keep an open ear and an open mind. She’ll reward you with all of her love.
Even if you don’t have much to say, let her in on what you’re thinking. If you’re the strong, silent type, she may misinterpret your feelings for her. Let her know what you’re thinking so that she doesn’t get the wrong idea.
If she wants to pay for something, let her. Just make sure that the roles aren’t reversed. She goes through a lot to look nice for you, and do sweet things for you, so try to pay for some things when you get the chance. This isn’t about the money. It’s about showing her that you care enough to treat her on occasion. It doesn’t have to be all the time, and don’t be flashy about it or act like it’s a big deal. Just act like the man.
Part 3 of 4: Going Beyond What’s Expected
Be romantic. Every girl wants a guy with a sense of romance. Girls like to pretend (deep down inside, mostly; sometimes very literally) that they are stars of their own fairy tale, and they want to be treated like it. Show your girl that you care about her by putting a little effort into your romance.
Write her love notes. Notes don’t have to be long, mushy and poetic if you’re not the type. Quick and silly ones will do just fine. Try to make them cute (girls love things that are “cute,” like a drawing) as a way to show her that you care. Write the notes on actual paper, too.
Don’t email or text her this. Emails tell her you’re lazy and not willing to put in extra time for her. Be a man, put some effort into it, and write her a good, old-fashioned letter.
Tell her that you’re lucky that you found her. Tell her that she makes you want to treat yourself better. Tell her that from the moment you first saw her, you knew she was special. This is a great way to be romantic.
Be thoughtful. The small things matter the most. Be a gentleman. Hold doors open for her. Thinking of her means putting yourself in her shoes sometimes and wondering what you can give her or do for her.
Ask her if she’s cold when it’s cold out; have a jacket or a sweater handy so you can give it to her.
When she isn’t feeling well, or she’s sick, bring her some soup, hot tea or flowers. Hold her hand at the movies or when you’re walking. Get her something just because.
Small things like a single flower, a magazine you know she likes, a bag of her favorite candy or a chocolate bar will go a long way. Show her that you’re thinking about her.
Remember what she likes and dislikes. Being romantic is all about taking what you know about her and showing her how much these things mean to you.
How does she like her eggs cooked? What is her favorite flower? What about perfume? What does she enjoy doing when it comes to dates? What are her favorite books, and her favorite songs?
Remember what she likes to eat and cook it for her. Or remember what kinds of flowers make her feel womanly, and send them to her. Or remember what songs make her want to dance, laugh, and cry, and make a mix for her.
Remember important dates. This is a big deal with women. Birthdays, anniversaries and other milestones are all opportunities to show her how special she is to you. Keep an agenda or a calendar with all these dates.
When it’s her birthday, bring her a present (chocolates, gift certificates, shoes all work great) and send her some flowers. Don’t forget to write her a card, being funny and romantic about how she’s getting older but that, to you, she’ll always be as young as the day when you first saw her.
When it’s your anniversary, book something special for you both to let her know how much you appreciate and love her. Make a scrapbook where you keep all the ticket stubs of the places you’ve gone together, and jot down your memories of the dates.
Send her a Facebook video message where you tell her how important she is to you, and how you’ll never forget the first date you two went on.
Remember that women want to be spoiled on these occasions. Flowers at her door, dinner together in a nice place — these things show that you care. Remember that it isn’t about the money, but the thought behind the action that counts.
Part 4 of 4: Understanding What Makes Her Happy
Understand what makes women click. Women are maternal creatures: they love taking care of things. That’s why she cooks you great meals, or packs your backpack, or worries when you don’t call after you’ve gone home. Take advantage of her nature and show her that you appreciate her effort, and let her know that you care back.
Remember that women have been raised around stories that end in ladies finding the “Perfect Man,” becoming a Princess and living happily ever after. It’s ingrained into their subconscious that they must find a man who is perfect in every way. While this is basically impossible, you want to try to be that prince for her.
Girls want to feel special. Girls want to be able to brag to their girlfriends about how great you are; they want to know that you’re as invested in the relationship as they are; they want to picture themselves being the luckiest girl in the world. Be the kind of guy that gives her these things.
The more you make her feel like it’s her specifically that you love, and not just any old girlfriend, the more special she’ll feel.
So, don’t say “I love curves on women” if you want to compliment her; instead, say “I love how your curves show off your beautiful body.”
Likewise, don’t compliment her feminine assets as much as the things that are truly unique about her. Something like “I never realized until now how your eyes look exactly like sapphires,” is a lot more endearing than something about her chest.
Understand the differences between men and women. We all know that men and women think and behave differently. It’s important to know why, because it will help you do some of the things she expects you to do.
Understand that she doesn’t think she’s being clingy. Being around, worrying about your safety — these things are a natural part of being a woman, and therefore part of who she is. Learn to love that aspect of her.
Think of it as a good thing: Women are only inclined to be “clingy” if they genuinely love and care about you a great deal. If she has stopped doing these things, there may be something wrong!
If you need a little break from her, tell her in a sweet, loving way: “You know I love spending time with you. But I haven’t seen my boys in a while, and I was hoping to catch a movie with them this weekend. Do you mind if I go?”
It’s not all about sex for her. Guys have a much different sexual drive than girls. For girls, it’s not about the sex itself, but rather about the intimacy or closeness that she shares with you. If she thinks that all you want from her is sex, she’s probably not going to give it to you. If she believes that she’s all you want, then eventually she’ll give all of herself to you.
Be confident. Girls love guys who are really confident in who they are. Remember, you don’t have to be Brad Pitt or LeBron James to be confident. Being confident is all about knowing who you are, knowing what you like and dislike, and being calm and collected.
Pay attention to what you look like. Shower or bathe yourself regularly, and put on clean, nice-looking clothes. Girls don’t need you to look like a male model, but they want other girls to take notice of what a catch you are, and how well you take care of yourself.
Learn to crack a joke. A joke is a great way of projecting your inner confidence. Studies show that men with a sense of humor are very desirable as mates. So, practice jokes, learn which parts of you are funny, and don’t be afraid to make fun of yourself. A man with a good sense of humor screams confidence.
Never lie. How would you feel if she started lying to you? Lying is a trust issue, and trust for girls is huge. Give her the same trust she gives you.
The problem with lying is that one lie produces more lies. You usually don’t just tell one lie; you get caught in a web of lies. And then it’s just simple math: The more lies you tell, the sooner you’re going to get caught.
Be confident enough not to lie. If you stop being embarrassed about things, you won’t have to lie about them. Even if they are embarrassing, don’t let them get to you. Your confidence will grow by the second.
A Freelance Journalist, Entrepreneur and Philanthropist. Editor-in-Chief of www.233times.com. A contributory writer for Ghanaian Chronicle Newspaper. An alumnus of Adisadel College where he read General Arts. He holds first degree in Bachelor of Arts from the University of Ghana; Political Science (major) and History (minor). He has also pursued MSc Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) and Energy with Public Relations (PR) at the Robert Gordon University in the United Kingdom. He is a 2018 Mandela Washington Fellow (YALI) who studied at Clark Atlanta University on the Business and Entrepreneurship track. His mentors are Rupert Murdoch, Warren Buffet, Sam Jonah, Kwaku Sakyi Addo and Piers Morgan