The 5 stages every relationship goes through – According to Science

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black-couple-moving-in-togetherDo you really know what’s going on in your body when you fall in love?

We already know that love is, as they say, “a many splendid thing,” but do you really know what’s going on in your body when you fall in love? It’s like utter madness.

You’re sick to your stomach but in a good way thanks to butterflies! Your libido is out of control; you literally can’t get enough of that person, and obsession and infatuation are just part of the game.

But now, a new study of the brains of people in love has found that there are five stages every relationship goes through when they fall for someone. Let’s cover them now, shall we?


Definitely the best parts of first falling in love are the butterflies and infatuation. In some cases, infatuation can be a bad thing, but when you’re both in it to win it, it’s wonderful. You can’t sleep, you can’t concentrate, and the most important thing in the world is getting to see that person again.

The study found that 56 percent of people in the butterfly stage also noted an obvious increase in their sex drive, meaning pretty much that all you want to do is bang your new love until the break of dawn.


This is when things calm down in your body a bit. According to the study, neurochemicals are released that turn up the volume in your heart rate and pleasure zones. In fact, the scientists say these feelings are on par with Class A drugs. You experience something called a “happy anxiety,” and finding a way to sleep is still difficult. The honeymoon phase may be over, but things have yet to totally cool off.


Naturally, you will have to get to a point where you sort of second-guess what’s going on. During the assimilation stage, you start wondering if things are “right.” You start asking yourself if this is what you want, can you see yourself with the person for the long haul, and is it more serious than you expected? It’s not about self-doubt as much as it’s about trying to figure out what’s right for you and your future.


According to the study, “This stage deals with the concept behind how we all put on our best faces, through social media we edit our lives as well as our pictures to make it appear as though everything is fine,” but it’s time to get real about the stages every relationship goes through. It may seem like you’re taking a risk in showing your true self, so usually in this stage stress levels start to climb.

The study found that 15 percent of people experience “feelings of doubt and increased vulnerability,” when it came to being honest about who they really are and all those weird quirks that we all have. It’s not easy to expose both the best and worst of you, but it’s a necessary step in making a relationship work.


After the ups and downs, and questions about your future, the stability stage is where everything falls into place and you feel safe. Vasopressin, the same hormone released when you orgasm, is circulating around your body and creates strong feelings of attachment and bonding.

Couples are very happy at this stage, even if the initial intensity has worn off. It’s these feelings that really make for a long-lasting relationship. It’s actually the best stage of all and if you’re lucky, you still have the butterflies, too.

–Your Tango

ABOUT: Nana Kwesi Coomson

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An Entrepreneur and Philanthropist. Editor-in-Chief of A Senior Journalist with Ghanaian Chronicle Newspaper. An alumnus of Adisadel College where he read General Arts. He holds first degree in Bachelor of Arts from the University of Ghana; Political Science (major) and History (minor). He has also pursued MSc Corporate Social Responsibility (CSR) and Energy with Public Relations (PR) at the Robert Gordon University in the United Kingdom. He is a 2018 Mandela Washington Fellow (YALI) who studied at Clark Atlanta University on the Business and Entrepreneurship track. His mentors are Rupert Murdoch, Warren Buffet, Sam Jonah, Kwaku Sakyi Addo and Piers Morgan

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